Day 13: Heavenly Potatoes, the Week One Catch Up

Due to the laziness I have acquired the past 18 years, and the desire I do not have to write an essay about "hell week", this shall be another one of my magical bullet posts. So, I hope this not only satisfies everyone's curiosities, but also makes room for more fun things you could be doing this summer. Here we go.

Day One: Hospital Holiday:
Pros:

• I get to sleep as much as I want.
• My bed is rather comfy.
• HOT BLANKETS(:
• Nurse Tina alerted people that I cannot talk! 
• Morphine button.

Cons:

• There is a gnarly tube up my nose to suck up fluids.
• Said tube is sucking up nearly 55cc's of blood and snot.
• When I press my call button to be disconnected from my IV and nose tube to pee, the nurses say "What do you need?" over intercom... I cannot talk. Oh the irony.
• I have to wear weird pulsating boots to keep my circulation going.

Day Two: Homeward Bound:

Pros:

• I get to go home!
• I can wear my own clothes again, no more bootylicious hospital gown.
• My IV/ snot tube/ boots are taken off.
• I got to take a shower.
• We missed most of the potholes on the way back.
• I got food! Kind of...

Cons:

• We had to sit in a car for two hours.
• I had to be awake so my head wouldn't hit the windshield.
• Still feeling pretty icky.
• I can't blow my nose, and there is quite a bit of snot.

Days Three- Five: Oh, the Humanity!

Pros:

• ....
• ......
• .........

Cons:

• You cannot blow your nose, which is way worse than it sounds.
• I had issues reaching even 1200 calories on a liquid diet.
• I threw up due to post nasal drip.
• Jaw spasms started.
• I was stuck sleeping upright in a chair.
• My swelling peaked, it was all the way to my eyes.
• Overall, I felt pretty cruddy.
• Had intestinal issues, couldn't use the bathroom.
• Most Ensure-type products are disgusting.
• Pain.

Days Six-Seven: Things are Looking Up:

Pros:

• I started to feel much better.
• My calorie intake was up.
• Down to oxycodone only in the mornings.
• On day seven I got to switch out my bands which entailed:
• Brushing my teeth.
• Eating a twice baked potato. (Heaven, difficult to eat, but heaven)
• Graduating to a no-chew diet instead of purely liquid.
• My energy is back up a bit.

Cons:

• Still feeling week sometimes.
• Sleeping is difficult, making my insomnia worsen.
• No-chew diets still aren't a party.
• Jaw spasms continue on.

Despite all of this, once the first week is over things get much easier. I even got to mash up cupcakes and eat them yesterday! The only thing that is really still bothering me is a cough that has come up due to that dreaded post-nasal drip. However, this is normal, it's just aggravated to due my asthma. Random fact: I can feel one of the screws in my face! It's really trippy.

New post Wednesday!